Sex Away From Home

By Fr Kelvin Ugwu June 28, 2020

Sex Away From Home

I read a story of a married man who left his wife at home, lied that he was going for a business meeting, but travelled to another state just to see his girlfriend–what is now popularly known as “side chick”.

What was he looking for? Sex!

The image of “he left sex at home in search of sex away from home” was what first came to my head.

But when he met the “side chick”, she was on her monthly period. That was when he came to his senses.

He looked at himself and how much respect people have for him. He thought of the risk he took driving for hours. He thought of the hiding. The lies he told at home. The money spent. All because of what??? The same thing he has legal right to at home and it is not as if his wife is denying him that right.

Again, we have seen or heard cases where children’s DNA do not match with their “supposed” fathers’. Do you need me to tell you the level of work women put in to cheat as well?

The image I get in all these is a bit funny. It is like saying, Mr A and Mrs A are married, then a little far from their home lies the home of Mr B who is also Married to Mrs B.

So, Mr A will sneak out of the house like a thief and secretly go to Mrs B to impregnate her. And Mr B, feeling he is the master game player, will sneak out of his wife and secretly go to Mrs A to impregnate her.

It may not exactly play out in the way I described it above, but there is that general attitude in all of us to tends to look down on what we have as not having value, only to appreciate and place high value on what we do not have…whereas, what we have might be all that we need.

We behave like kids or like birds — the ones in the cage, want to go out; the ones outside the cage, want to go in.

Sometimes it is important we ask ourselves sincerely. The energy we take in covering up our cheating plans. In keeping our phone chat secretly. The lies we tell. The fear of being caught. The money spent. The restlessness we feel when we could not see our monthly period. All these and even more just for an exchange of a few minutes of sex with another person that we are not married to, are they really worth it?

Sometimes as a man, it is important to ask yourself, how come every woman I see, I want to have? In my office, I have two. In my church, I have four. In my compound, there is another. Am I charmed???

As a woman, it is important to ask yourself, how come anytime I see a man with beard, my body starts doing me one kain and I start making advances? My husband is not around and I have invited the driver to the bedroom for other forms of “driving”. A pastor asked me to come and “take a suck” and I am running to meet him like my salvation depends on it. And when I eventually become pregnant, I pin the pregnancy on my husband and allow him raise children that are not his. Is everything alright with me???

Think about this, it was in the presence of everyone: your friends, your parents, your family members, your pastors, and most of all, it was in the presence of God, you made a solemn vow to your spouse. A vow that you will never cheat, that you will be faithful in good times and bad.

Does it make you a respectable person that you are doing exactly the opposite of what you promised during your wedding as if you were forced to make those vows?

It is a different thing that you fell, we all fall. But it is a total different thing that it has become your way of life and you are seeing it as normal. Such type of life brings misery at the end. For your own peace of mind, why not retrace your steps now that you can. Dedicate all those energies to your spouse and see how happy you will be.

May God bless you as you do not harden your heart to this! Amen!

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