How To Properly Flirt & Have Sex With Somebody New

By Ikenga Chronicles December 17, 2016

It’s especially easy to fall in love with someone we don’t know.

I like you best when I hardly know you at all, glancing at you across a crowded tea house. You turn me on; I imagine us vacationing in Turks and Caicos, making love until the wee hours of the night, then again the next morning on our way to honeymooning in Paris.

You smile, not at me, but at a passing thought, and it is obvious yours is the smile of my soulmate, my one and only. We are to live happily ever after and all of that will happen as soon as I know your name, court you and caress your endlessly sexy body.

In my daydream your room isn’t strewn with dirty clothes, your parents aren’t overbearing and they live far away, you like the same sort of food I do and the times and places we want sex are aligned with Swiss precision. I am a romantic painter with you a blank canvass.

Reaching out.

But converting that dream into a reality takes something special; it requires me to reach out. To take a risk. How often we don’t take that chance, we daydream instead of reaching out and go home alone. I vow that won’t happen here.

My body feels heavy with fear, the daydream falls away and my mind chatters about rejection—it remembers the last time my heart was broken and the time before that. It argues for staying in place, going home safe and alone. But I know how this works. The terror raging within me doesn’t mean anything: I don’t have to respond to it. Awkwardly I stand, I place one foot in front of the other in the direction of you and your laptop.


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