How to Love Fully without Losing Ourselves

By Ikenga Chronicles January 10, 2017

How to Love Fully without Losing Ourselves

Loving another person doesn’t mean we must give up ourselves.

When we find someone with whom we share a special connection, it seems that suddenly priorities shift, and we find ourselves concentrating more on the relationship itself rather than our own individual journey.

It doesn’t matter how much self-work we have done, nor does it matter how awakened or conscious we have become—for many of us, as soon as we say “I love you” to another, we forget to also keep loving ourselves.

To love another, and not lose ourselves in that process, is a balancing act of trust, patience and (maybe) just a little wildness.

For so many, it seems that when we are single we have reached our own individual level of perfection. We’re great at being alone. We know how to do us, and how to love the life we live.

Yet, as soon as we begin seeing someone, it becomes more about cuddles and kisses than growth and dreams. But the reality is that when someone falls in love with us, they do so because of the person we are.

For most of us who enter into a new relationship, the highest ideal is that we don’t wish to change the person we are becoming involved with. We noticed them because of their ambitions and their heart. We became interested in them because of how they see the world, and we fell in love with them because no one matches their own individual fire.

Yet, just because we have now found “the one” doesn’t mean that we should abandon ourselves.

In the best of relationships, people don’t operate independently, but as a team. It’s the coming together of two people who decide to make choices and goals, not just for the betterment of one individual, but


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