Hahaaeeeee E e e,Hahaaeeeee: Buhari To Lead ECOWAS Delegation To Jammeh–Dum Syl Aminikpo

By Ikenga Chronicles January 13, 2017

Hahaaeeeee E e e,Hahaaeeeee: Buhari To Lead ECOWAS Delegation To Jammeh–Dum Syl Aminikpo

“Buhari to lead ECOWAS negotiation team to the Gambia to convince Jammeh to handover.”

That was the headline I saw somewhere. Whoever conjured this sentence should be given an award. Never! I mean, never in my entire life have I seen antithesis so flawlessly and aptly employed.

And in one sentence? Jesus Christ! Has genius any better definition?

Take the words apart:

Buhari.          Lead.             Convince.

Memory lane:
“You do not expect those who gave me 5%…”

Earlier on:

Question: “Mr president, how do you hope to run an inclusive government…?”
Like some poorly written kindergarten movie script, the president of the most populous African country, formerly giant of the continent drew the head of the moderator closer, and trancelike  blurted;

“Errm, what is inclusive?”

And then, that trademark percentage howler that left the world in shockmode.

Some answer by a negotiator.

Growing up in my village in Koroma Tai, we had this group of women who usually gathered under a tree at the Christ Army Church. Sick people who were tended to by Tee Pipi, the great spiritual healer also stayed there. They invented a laugh pattern;

“hahaaeeeee
E e e, hahaaeeeee”

It was usually group laughter. A form of mockery that rises and gradually fades unexpectedly, like a prophetic outcome for that which it mocked.

To this choice of Buhari, Jammeh must have taken a cue from those women, and repeatedly laughed;

“hahaaeeeee
E e e, hahaaeeeee”

Buhari, the leader of herdsmen.
Buhari, the man who’s so scared a kid can post a note online and he will cancel his trip.
Buhari, the president whose best books are cartoons.
Buhari, who would rather stop terrorism in Western Germany than face his Boko boys and the genocide in Southern Kaduna.

Ah, that was the same man, the barely audible kaftan-garbed blame-tagging president West African leaders sent to convince Jammeh!

It was already planned to fail. How do you ask someone who has barely convinced anyone to handle a negotiation of such magnitude?

Is that not the same man whose wife doubted his sense of judgement?

My dear OBJ, how I miss you now. I hate you for your perpetual meddlesome nature, but times like this call for real men. REAL LEADERS WHO KNOW THEIR ONUS.

Buhari’s only plan will be to resort to war. That’s what he knows. That’s all he’s ever known. That’s all he will ever resort to in the event of any friction.

That’s what has happened in the Gambia.

I mean, has he been able to settle any dispute at home, even with his forces?

“Buhari to lead ECOWAS negotiation team to the Gambia to convince Jammeh to handover”

Such antithesis!

  • Mr. Aminikpo is the host of “From the Lunatic’s Pad” on Ikenga Chronicles, and is on Twitter as @dumsyl 
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